Wednesday, May 15, 2013

ZAP! #120: Par Three

ZAP! #120

     Many of you are aware of the long held superstition or triplicity regarding the number three.  Some contend that this belief is tied to biblical rationale, Norse mythology, etc.  Part of the theory is that things (both good and bad) will witness three occurrences...most of the same nature.  

     An example would be a noted individual dies and within two or more days it seems as if two other infamous persons enter the pushing-up daisy business.

     Using this superstition as a sign for a possible future event, it appears that the city of Dallas, et al are tripping the wire for a ‘hat trick’ (soccer term for three goals) at Irving’s expense.  Wanting to recover everything that Irving has ‘stolen’ from them over the past decades, we now know the following:
  • Ex-mayor Gears is credited with witnessing the Dallas Cowboys leaving Irving and relocating to Arlington during his watch.
  • The HP Byron Nelson announced that they will be leaving Irving for South Dallas during mayor Van Duyne’s reign.  (Note: Will players on the new South Dallas course be required to play each round wearing Kevlar vests?)
     To ward off this possibility of Irving loosing another major accoutrement before a new mayor might be elected, the city council needs to be pro active and take immediate action.  To short circuit the cycle of three without penalizing local citizens, Irving should donate, to the city of Dallas, the Ruth Paine “Oswald Slept Here” house that the Irving council has spent hundreds of thousands of bucks on in an attempt to create a tourist attraction in the city.

     Wouldn’t this be a fitting gesture?  One of the more popular presidents in American history, John Fitzgerald Kennedy, was murdered in Dallas, so having the house where the assassin spent his last night might be more appropriate to install on the new South Dallas golf course...18th tee box.

     By giving this house to Dallas, more tourist will, at least, be able to see the expensive and macabre donation from the Irving city council.  Fore! 

………………...Mark Holbrook