Wednesday, February 12, 2014

ZAP! #149: Political Comedy

ZAP! #149

     How can you tell when a state representative has been in Austin too long to be effective and actually representing Irving constituents?

     The answer is very simple voter breath.  You just watch the latest political commercial for Linda Harper-Brown’s re-election campaign for District 105.  Actually, it may have been better if she had aired this commercial on the Comedy Central channel instead of Fox News.  The effects would have been the same!

     Commercial Recap:  Fade in to Harper-Brown cutting out a string of paper dolls, that transitions to her trimming a bonsai plant, and moves on to her giving a quick snip of a grandkid’s locks, to clipping all the coupons out of her hubby’s newspaper.

     If one had to guess, the theme of this inane commercial was to demonstrate that Harper-Brown knows how to use a pair of scissors.  Or maybe, she has been in Austin so long that she is starting to practice activities for her eventual retirement in a political-assisted living facility.  Regardless, Irving voters who view the commercial will wonder: And this is our state representative...cutting out a string of paper dolls?  Has she ever cut our taxes with this same zeal?  Has she ever cut the strings of special interest groups tied to her voting arm with this fervor?

     The only saving grace of this commercial is that Harper-Brown has plenty of campaign bucks to blow on such silliness.  After all, her campaign “sugar daddy,” who is the same “sugar daddy” for mayor BVD, has been busy trolling all the PACs that have previously tied their special interest strings to Harper-Brown’s voting arm over the last decade.  In fact, several of the PACs that donate generously to the Harper-Brown campaign turn around and present her with an “award.”  Most often, these “awards” are bestowed on legislators who are severely pliable to the special interest group’s whims, fancies and legislative interest.

     Staff of the CCR is starting to feel extremely sorry for Harper-Brown...for all the years we have kicked her cat.  (And kick it we have!)  We never realized that her “political condition” of accepting all of these PAC and special interest bucks had reached the point of her transitioning to retirement in a political-assisted living facility.

     Irving constituents should not fret over Harper-Brown’s present “commercial-condition.”  After all, your tax dollars (and any left over campaign funds) will generously provide for her eventual retirement in only the best facility money can buy...once Rusk completes the remodeling for politically impaired Texas legislators.

…………………….Mark Holbrook