Thursday, August 21, 2014

CCR/DW 08-21-14: City Budget

TO:  CCR Tweet-less:

Here’s what you recently missed by not following: 
Dylan Westie   @DylanWestie1  on Twit-er.


Watching city council budget retreat. Apparent QueenB has an agenda which is not included in presentation materials. Flying Harpies on alert!

Listening to QueenB babble her budget philosophy sounds like the University of Photo Ops must offer minor in business/budget administration.

A couple of the Pet Rocks discuss budget as if applying for a role in a sketch on SNL. Will they follow QueenB & help create financial havoc?

Can CCR brain tolerate the rest of session? Alcohol doesn’t ease pain of QueenB & Pet Rocks believing they know more than city administration!


PLEASE: Someone inform QueenB VD how rude it is to interrupt, talk over w/condescending remarks when a councilman w/opposing viewpoints is speaking!



MH

Legal disclaimer at:   controversialcommittee.blogspot.com

§


Monday, August 18, 2014

CCR 08-17-14: Limited Edition



Note:  This Limited Edition* of the report was sent to just a few friends on the CCR mailing list for their chuckling enjoyment.  However, after receiving several amusing comments, staff of the CCR decided to post this on the blog.  In so doing, the wrath of the Mother Superior of Flying Harpies will probably swoop down on the entire CCR staff and cart us off to her Tower of Obedience…where we will  languish without WiFi capabilities.  MH

the   Controversial  Committee   Report
“We don’t raise sacred cows...we just butcher them.”

"LIMITED EDITION"

         It has come to the attention of the staff of the CCR that some subjects of QueenB VDs realm may not be following all edicts issued from her throne at city hall.  As can be imagined, this upsets and disturbs the queen to no end.  Even the word ‘hissy fit’ doesn’t cover her aggravation.

     Knowing that several significant events, requiring her undivided attention, will occur in the near future (ARK groundbreaking which might cause her to have a mane-flipping/Hollywood-posing photo op seizure; single source OliverMcMillan’s Tennis Center proposal; and the single train engine with a conflicting caboose pulling into the Whistle Stop development), the queen will be implementing a new battle plan.

     QueenB VD has directed her Mother Superior of Flying Harpies to assemble the flock and prepare to quash any and all opinions, thoughts, or expressions that do not coincide with the queen’s whims or temperament.  The Mother Superior of Flying Harpies will monitor all social media postings, listen to all speakers at council meetings, and advise other harpies, in the flock, which subjects should be rained down on with critical rejoinders, harsh verbiage or posting of counter attacks with downright ‘fluffy and fuzzy’ spin that would appease the queen.

     If readers of the CCR doubt the effectiveness of the Mother Superior of Flying Harpies, staff of the CCR recently had a drone fly over her headquarters in the queen’s Tower of Obedience.

     Remember, this is who you will be doing battle with should you desire to evade the queen’s edicts, or register any moaning, complaints, or groveling:





…………………Mark Holbrook  (Not me in the above pic!)


* LIMITED EDITION:  This "report" was sent to a very few, select readers of the CCR and was not blasted to the entire readership list.  This doesn’t make you special, but means you can take a joke, agree with the imbedded satirical message, or just enjoy "kicking the cat."  What you do with the report after receiving it is at your discretion.  However, staff of the CCR would suggest you not forward to the queen, a flying harpy or any of the queen’s Kool-Aid-mead sippers…they are not as easily amused!  MH

Saturday, August 16, 2014

CCR/DW Short List Posting



TO:  CCR Tweet-less:

Here’s what you recently missed by not following: 
Dylan Westie   @DylanWestie1  on Twit-er.

Grand DART/DFW Orange celebration whistles past Irving w/o QueenB VD or Danish on dais. No photo op for the queen? Expect severe retribution!

Webster’s: Political Parasite = Unelectable IISD candidate M. Benavidez's ego trumping student concerns w/his two law suits. Expect >taxes for all his legal fees.

MH
Legal disclaimer at:   controversialcommittee.blogspot.com

§


Friday, August 15, 2014

CCR 08-15-14: Ho, Ho, Give Me

the   Controversial  Committee   Report
“We don’t raise sacred cows...we just butcher them.”


     No, your calendar is not wrong!  It is August, but in QueenB VDs realm, this is of no consequence.  You see, the queen plans to celebrate Xmas next weekAugust 21-22, 2014.

     Readers are probably wondering how this might be possible.  Very simple explanation.  When the council meets next week to put the final polish on the 2014-15 city budget at their retreat, the queen has her shopping list ready for items to be approved.  And via an edict of the queen, the new city manager must slash the budget 17% to accommodate her desires(Subjects or city needs will have to settle for large lumps of coal next year.)

     Of course, the queen will posture around phony verbiage of wanting to cut taxes for her subjects, but her real motivation is to have the necessary tax funds available to purchase all items on her wish list.

     And what does the queen have on her Xmas shopping list?  Well, as one might imagine, none of the items are for subjects of the realm.  Here is what the queen will demand, to be included, in the new budget to recognize her self-greatness:

  • 25 cases of special order, yellow tennis balls which have the queen’s crest imprinted.  These will be utilized at her new Tennis Center located on the old Texas Stadium site.
  • 5 reams of Blanket Waiver of Ethics forms for OliverMcMillan and Whistle Stop’s next appearance before the council with their development projects.  The forms will also speed her approval process for all single source developers she chooses in the future.
  • New personnel positions for three city staff photographers.  This will allow 24/7 coverage for all her photo ops.
  • Installation of a jamming device in city hall so that only she can text while meetings are in progress.
  • Renovation of her Tower of Obedience to accommodate more individuals who have been detained by her Mother Superior of Flying Harpies.  New verbal-water boarding rooms will be added to assist in the re-education processes of wayward subjects.
  • A 192% increase in her city-paid travel expenses.  This is necessary in order for her to traipse about on unnecessary trips to spread her spin and self-graciousness on unknowing subjects in distant realms.
  • Two train tanker cars loaded with liquid NPD* medication which will be used to spike the city’s water supply.  This will eliminate her worrying about any possible competition to the queen’s throne.
  • Construction of a new throne for the council chambers which will be two feet higher than the seats of her Pet Rocks and the other non-consequential members of the council.
  • An improved neck brace to avoid spasms from continuous mane flipping.
  • A larger ‘cloak of invisibility’ to keep prying eyes of subjects from observing her while meeting with potential developers or sugar daddy contributors at local watering holes around the city.

     In the queen’s holiday celebration version, the only ghost to appear will be the ghost of Xmas Past to pay her a visit.  Morris Parrish will appear and give her a "Be Kind" sign as his gratitude for QueenB VD replacing him as the lowest ranking mayor on the city’s totem pole of past mayors.

     The queen would extend to each and every one of her subjects good wishes for her holiday celebration, but then…this is all about her, isn’t it?

……………………Mark Holbrook 


*  NPD is Narcissistic Personality Disorder.  Specific conditions noted at: http://psychcentral.com/disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder-symptoms/


Thursday, August 14, 2014

CCR 08-14-14: No Mandate w/Five

the   Controversial  Committee   Report
“We don’t raise sacred cows...we just butcher them.”


     Yes, dear readers, Irving is a divided city.  And contrary to what many may think, the division is not just a north vs. south issue.  No, a massive schism does exist in Irving’s leadership as recently exhibited by QueenB VD.  Even as a council member, she reflected a dark side of her persona for issues which did not go her way.  This week, the darkness was lit brightly by an issue that did go her way.

     What the queen managed to do was throw, into the proverbial ‘fan, a load of NPD-glee which sprayed across the entire city causing an indelible stain and political stench.  Certainly, the queen’s action will permanently ‘brand’ her image at city hall for the ages.

     Just when you thought things might settle down in the city, QueenB VD drags out leftover campaign stationary to blast the realm in an e-mail dishing a load of self-serving tripe that could clog the Trinity River.  As always, the topic was about her and how magnificent everything she does might be.  Her topic this time was her "fuzzy" ethics code which squeaked by with a one vote margin!*  One vote margin and she treats her actions as if she just ushered in the 19th Amendment. 

     What makes this recent mailing by the queen more unsettling are the tactics she employed.  Her e-mail blast across the city was not only self-congratulatory, but she ‘called out’ the council members who did not support her travesty of legislation.  That’s right…called them out!  

     Staff of the CCR has yet to find anyone in the community who knows of a similar instance where a sitting council member or mayor has bullied or browbeaten their colleagues publicly in this manner.  Former mayor Morris Parrish must be clapping at his celestial residence realizing he has finally been replaced as the lowest scoring mayor on the city’s totem pole of past mayors. 

     And if you didn’t believe the queen’s self-identified greatness noted in this e-mail posting, then observe how her Flying Harpies and one Vacuous Ogre posted lauds and hosannas on FaceBook in her honor.  The queen even had the Flying Harpy patrol circling over ever post to rebut, refute or renounce any viewpoint contrary to her e-mail routing regarding the ethics code.

     And one should believe these harpies as they are spouting the talking points the queen has provided them in an attempt to defend her defenseless position of political arrogance.  Why?  The Mother Superior of Harpies would ensure that you do…or else be prepared for verbal water boarding. 

     Case in Point 1:  QueenB VDs city-blasted e-mail stated how great her new ethics code, which she pimped for four years, was going to fix or resolve all of Irving’s problems.  (OK, she finally got one piece of paperwork passed…by a one vote margin.)  However, not everyone agreed with her assessment…especially since the code was watered down, non-essential, or meaningless in areas each time when reviewed by the council.  That’s politics…agree/disagree, vote yea/nay.  End of the issue.

     What is not good politics is the mayor of Irving ‘calling out’ council members who did not support her ‘fuzzy’ ethics revisions.  The final vote was widely known by anyone who cared to know.  The vote was documented in the DMN, FaceBook, coffee shop gatherings and other social media sites monitored and posted on by the queen’s harpies.  So, why a city-wide mailing if not for personal-publicity consideration? 
  
     Here’s the queen’s self-absorbed notation is her city-wide e-mail castigating her colleagues by name and contact information:

"And while not everyone on the council agreed that we should expand our ethics policy, I appreciated all the input and counsel we received in order to develop a policy that could earn the majority of support.  Those who voted in opposition to the stronger ethics policy were:
Councilman John Danish, Place 1                               jdanish@cityofirving.org
Councilman Allan Meagher, Place 2                          ameagher@cityofirving.org
Councilman Dennis Webb, Place 3                            denniswebb@cityofirving.org
Councilman Joe Putnam, Place 4                               jputnam@cityofirving.org"
     It should be noted those who voted against the ethics policy revisions did not do so because they were against stronger ethics as suggested by the queen.  That’s laughable considering the individuals noted and the genuine dedication they have exhibited while serving the city.  The negative votes registered, by more rational thinkers than the queen and her Pet Rocks, would include such concerns of theirs as: the code revisions were not necessary; the caps were mere window dressing and strictly political in nature (so the queen could again smite her previous opponent); the city and state’s current ethics code regulations cover all concerns city officials must legally observe; the provision to ‘identify lobbyist’ in the city’s new code will not even pass the smell test for being practical or possible; there are no penalties established for violations of the revised code; and having a city panel established to hear complaints registered against potential code violators (which will probably only include the queen’s political foes being reviewed ) will not do anything but continue the political schism QueenB VD has created which divides Irving.  
Case in Point 2:  While the queen and her Flying Harpy flock addressed the above, QueenB VD also managed to find time to blast the DMN reporter for his failure (her words) in his coverage of the ethics code vote by not proclaiming her actions as surpassing the invention of the Internet.  Remember, this was an old campaign issue.  And as "fuzzy" as her policy was, she wanted the spotlight to shine brightly for a giddy NPD-celebration dance.  Her notes to the reporter (via his tweet account @aviselk) reflected how when it’s the queen’s idea, the queen’s handiwork, or the queen’s edict, all reporting should be noteworthy, highly praising and laudatory of her majesty’s greatness.  If the reporter was an Irving subject, he would probably be banished to her Tower of  Obedience(Is it possible slow learning Cornell business students are not made cognizant of the fact newspapers have more printing ink than a home HP laser jet printer?)
     If you were one of the luck subjects (staff of the CCR was unlucky and received a copy) in QueenB VDs realm and did not receive a copy of her self-congratulatory notification of the ethics code vote, drop her a line at:  bvd234@yahoo.com  She will be happy to hear from you and will respond…if not busy with a scheduled photo op.
……………………….Mark Holbrook

The one vote margin to pass QueenB VDs ethics code revision resulted from her new Pet Rock, Ward.  And many surmise he had to vote in favor of this issue due to: Upcoming council consideration where he is in a partnership with two others seeking city funding on a project; and demonstrate he supports ethics to deflect any possible criticism with his partnership involvement…even though he will be required to abstain from participating in discussions or voting on the issue where he has a financial interest.  While he may not have a legal conflict of interest, many believe he has a moral conflict as a serving council member.  (For the Record: QueenB VDs main campaign supporter is also a member of this partnership attempting to do business with the city.)  If the city council approves funds to Ward’s partnership, then this will be another first in the city’s history…a sitting council member receiving city funding for a private venture while serving on the council.  

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

CCR 08-12-14: Malts and Muddle

the   Controversial  Committee   Report
“We don’t raise sacred cows...we just butcher them.”


     UPDATE:  While many CCR readers were disturbed and incensed regarding the city utilizing General Fund property tax bucks to pay for the renovation of the old Big State Drug Store for the benefit of the property owner, it appears the original proposal to fund 37%, or $202,000 by the city for the entire renovation project has been taken off the table. 

     The $202,000 was the city’s proposal as documented in the June 26, 2014 Planning and Development committee meeting.

     Accordingly, staff of the CCR has been informed the city will only fund the new parking lot.  While the city council has approved $75,000 of General Fund tax dollars for this work, the actual cost might be in the $40,000 - $50,000 range.  The city’s agreement with the property owner stipulates that the parking will be ‘public parking’ for five years, but there will not be any signage designating the area as ‘public parking.’

     Staff of the CCR has also been advised the Big State parking lot project will be the only city funds dedicated to this renovation.  Apparently, the property owner will not be seeking matching funds (approved by city staff without city council advisement, unless $50,000 or more) for any exterior renovations of the building.
     

     UPCOMING:  The next issue of the CCR will reflect how QueenB VDs self-promotion, utilizing outdated campaign letterhead, of the ethics code passage has caused the most massive rift ever witnessed among Irving elected officials.  (And if her Pet Rocks are proud of this faux leadership, then the issue is even deeper than expected.)  The queen’s action via her e-mail blast to the realm has dropped her creditability and believability lower than that of former mayor Morris Parrish…which is almost hard to believe possible.  Stay tuned!


……………………….Mark Holbrook  

Sunday, August 10, 2014

CCR 08-10-14: Lobby Hobby

the   Controversial  Committee   Report
“We don’t raise sacred cows...we just butcher them.”


     Fact!  Staff of the CCR will not miss the train when QueenB VDs revised ethics code leaves the station.(1)  Actually, staff of the CCR will be the first in line at Irving City hall, having purchased a ticket for the ride, to become the first registered city lobbyist.

     Yes, to ensure we follow all of the prescribes buried in the queen’s new flimflam ethics code, staff of the CCR is eager to get this ball rolling…uphill.  Of course, the reams of paperwork required to be completed for being a city lobbyist is daunting and demeaning.  

     For everyone (principals, business owners, in-laws, partners, family members, cousins, clergy, et al) associated with a concern being represented before the council, a lobbyist is required to include the names of all individuals involved with the issue.  This poses some classification concerns for the lobbyist.  

     Case in Point: Under what category do you place Aunt Bertha’s AKC registered Shih Tzu?  Are both ex’s required to be listed if alimony payments are not being paid?  If your grammar school teacher is deceased, are surviving members of her family required to be noted?  Are photos of ancestors arriving at Plymouth Rock really necessary?  Without listing all of this detailed information, a lobbyist cannot represent subjects before the city council.

     However, being the first registered city lobbyist has many advantages.  The best advantage is clients subjects are excited about the CCR representing their interest before the city council.  For too long, individuals have not had a meaningful voice at city hall…mainly because they didn’t contribute mega-bucks to the queen’s treasury.  

     Lobbying for the interest of subjects will allow the public to observe many changes the queen and Pet Rocks should consider.  Once again, subjects will have a voice and will not need to be fearful of queenly retribution.  That’s right, the staff of the CCR will absorb any adverse reactions the queen might consider when the CCR represents the interest of subjects.  This way, subjects are protected and their message is able to be broadcast throughout the queen’s realm via ICTN.  (Rumor has the queen taking control of ICTN broadcasts due to the fact cameras do not focus on her more during meetings.)

     If you are an individual or group requiring representation before the city council, drop the CCR a line.  We’ll be happy to add you to our growing list of subjects.  Those who are currently on board with the CCR as their lobbyist are: 

PITHY (People for the Inhumane Treatment of Harpy Yammerers): This organization recognizes the need to finally address harpies, who have yet to earn their wings, for their rashness and the blather they spout throughout the queen’s realm.  These flightless versions of the harpy family continually babble inane, non-factual information with glee and abandon on the queen’s behalf.  While these harpies are similar to a Flying Harpy, this wingless strain is not as vicious.  This is due to their tongues not being as sharp and their talons not polished steel.  Once PITHY harnesses all the harpies and places them in re-education programs, an attempt will be made to reign in the more vicious Flying Harpies.

CADS (Citizens Against Donor Schemes)  Without a doubt, there is too much money floating around in Irving politics.  While the queen attempts to have her subjects believe she is above raking in mega-bucks from mega-donors, the actual figures on her campaign finance reports prove this wrong.(2)  And as previously noted in earlier CCR reports, money does talk and the queen is apparently a very, very good listener.  Sadly, the newly revised ethics code will allow previous mega-donors the ability to improve and increase their level of contributions.  Upper level donors, sugar daddy contributors, would also have the use, for one event, of a stadium suite in the queen’s proposed Tennis Center on the Texas Stadium site if they contribute the new maximum amount…$25,000.

O-CRAP (Ordinary Citizens Revolting Against Politicos): This group is growing daily.  Many are tired of the city council handing out tax bucks to political cronies, developers, or large campaign donors; not dealing with those issues clearly important to the city; and having to deal with the wrath of the queen for having opposing viewpoints.  While this group has never been very vocal in the past, the number of leadership failings by the queen has prompted these individuals to finally let their voices be heard with the aid of the CCR as their lobbyist.  Instead of photo ops, the subjects of O-CRAP want attention to city-wide needs and concerns…not a Tennis Center or more developer hand outs.   

ROI:  Over the years as the council proceeded to dole out bucks to cronies, developers and special interest folks, an attempt was made to qualify this largeness by the queen and her Pet Rocks.  The rationale  promoted was the city would have a "return on investment" or ROI for these lavish and special interest expenditures.  This was supposed to mean: Tax payers should be happy their money was being spent foolishly and should remain quiet, dutiful and docile.  (When was the last dividend you received, or gratuitous ‘investment return’ from the queen and Pet Rocks?)  As a result of the new ethics code, ROI will now mean Revolution Of Involvement.  Subjects have endured four years of photo ops, gratuitous travel and entertaining those who might have business coming before the council by QueenB VD.  There has been little or no actual return on these "investments" for the shabby efforts and faux leadership of the queen.  ROI believes the revolution for city concerns must start today.  And ROI is ready for you to join them in these efforts! 

     Yes, QueenB VDs newly revised, ‘fuzzy’ ethics code promises to bring significant change to how the council does business, exposing council spending activities and how ordinary citizens are treated when appearing before the queen and her Pet Rocks.  As a city lobbyist, staff of the CCR will do their part to aid and assist all subjects and groups in these endeavors. 

     Consider joining one of the above groups.  Or, allow the CCR to lobby for your interest.  We do not charge subjects fees for our services.  Our payment is when subjects take back control of a city which has run off the rails while the queen has hastily sped through the city, in her carriage, to the next photo op.

     And don’t be surprised if at the start of a future council meeting you hear QueenB VD and her Pet Rocks whisper to each other…O-CRAP…ROI is in the house!

………………………Mark Holbrook

Notes:
1)  The official ethics code signing and photo op will be prior to the next city council meeting.  The first ten subjects in attendance will receive one of the souvenir pens used by QueenB VD, as she puts pen to parchment on this momentous legislative disaster.  Free mead, laced with Kool-Aid and NPD medications, will also be available.  A photo op with the queen will be possible for $29.99…sugar daddy donors do not have to pay.

2)  Refer to the 08-08-14 CCR report or  http://www.ci.irving.tx.us/city-secretary/elections/campaign-finance-forms-2014.asp  for a review of the mega-donors to the queen’s slush fund.