Friday, December 21, 2012

CCR 12-21-12: Spreading the Word

the   Controversial  Committee   Report
“We don’t raise sacred cows...we just butcher them.”

WARNING: Center for Disease Control Issues Alert for Irving

      We finally pursued a suggestion by a disgruntled reader of the CCR and met with a medical professional skilled in the art and workings of cerebral activities.  This was done to determine the validity of an assertion made by the reader.  We wanted to verify if their opinion, or the point they attempted to make was sound or just plain flaky.  After all, preparing these reports takes a bit of time away from our busy retirement life and from other important restocking the bird feeder.

     So, off we went to the shrink.  And after reading the past three years of CCR reports, ZAP! musings and City Hall Elevator Rumblings, the doc declared that staff of the CCR was A-okay, but the reader registering the gripe and whining was suffering from a severe case of political torofeca.  

     For the uninformed, political torofeca is a highly contagious disease affecting, carried and transmitted by elected officials.  Currently, this disease has reached pandemic stages on the national level, with mild outbreaks in the state.  However, a dangerous and increasing number of recent cases have been reported and identified as originating in Irving.  And this accounts for the CDC issuing a warning for Irving residents.  

     (Ed. note: The December 13, 2012 city council meeting witnessed some elected officials infecting a rather large gathering of individuals at city hall with political torofeca.)

     An individual comes in contact with political torofeca when they hear what an elected official espouses only to discover that the politico actually believes what they are saying.  This is especially true when a politico rationalizes or has their hand in the proverbial cookie jar utilizing tax payer funds in a manner not deemed kosher.  There are similar instances when a politico stretches flimsy rhetoric beyond the credibility of reality...which is often.  Following are some additional cases where an elected official exhibits severe political torofeca symptoms:

  • Infers campaign contributions from Special Interest Groups do not affect their voting
  • Travels on junkets with funds provided by Special Interest Groups
  • Blathers on both sides of an issue before voting for Special Interest Group concerns
  • Refuses to respond to media inquiries, then asserts the media is biased or untruthful
  • Speaks in condescending terms to those who do not support their position on an issue
  • Actually believe they are an oracle of truth and wisdom while all the “little people,” who are not members of a Special Interest Group, are mere dimwitted simpletons.

While there is no magical cure for political torofeca, there are steps an individual can take to limit their exposure or ward off the effects from carriers of the disease.  These would include:

  • Not re-electing those suffering from this malady
  • Chunking a carrier of political torofeca into a fan
  • Send an e-mail to known carriers of the disease to document their condition
  • Alert family and friends to all known carriers of the sickness
  • Donate time and effort to combat the eradication of political torofeca

     Do your part to assist in eliminating the dreaded disease of political torofeca.  Only with due diligence can Irving tax payers be assured that elected officials are more concerned about citizen issues than those of Special Interest Groups.  Once this goal is achieved, then attention can be directed to eliminating a corollary and equally devastating civic sickness in Irving...bureaucratic torofeca.

..................................................Mark Holbrook

Several readers have requested clarification for the term used to describe the affliction a few council members seem to have contracted.  Hopefully, this will assist...MH

Clarification:  Staff of the CCR should point out that neither Google nor the Webster’s dictionary reflect a definition for torofeca.  The reason for this is simple...we coined the term.  To assist the word impaired, we offer this explanation: toro = bull; feca = feces.  We are confident that you now understand -- in a polite sense -- what several of our local politicos have been spreading in the city when it comes to million dollar consultant contracts...political torofeca. 

Note:  Due to a glitch in the Mayan calendar app, the CCR will remain in publication until the year 3012.