Wednesday, May 8, 2013

ZAP! #118: Odiferous App

ZAP! #118


     Great news!  the CCR has developed a computer App available for any citizen wanting to know or understand what a politico is really saying when all of the fluff and puff of disingenuous responses are spouted regarding public issues.

     For a limited time, the CCR will provide -- only $49.99 for your downloading pleasure -- the O-CRAP (Ordinary Citizens Revolting Against Politicos) App for your use.  Think of the O-CRAP App as working like a shovel to scrape away the verbal load a politico is attempting to spread or hide on the unsuspecting public.  

     The O-CRAP App is used by the CCR for all our report writing and has proven to be quiet effective in shining a bright light on what a politico wishes to remain in the dark.

     The O-CRAP App will filter a politico’s disingenuous statements or pronouncements and convert the verbiage into a meaningful response for real time understanding...which will be the opposite of what the politico originally intended.  The O-CRAP App also allows you to know the truth or facts about an issue based on its proprietary source document filter that can penetrate through any politico drivel or load.  And the App is voice activated: All you need to do after reading an insincere political statement is say ”O-CRAP.” 

EXAMPLES: Two statements recently made by politicos regarding the ‘resurrection’ of the Entertainment Center project have been filtered through the O-CRAP App.  See how effective it is in getting to the core of the politicos response?    

1. "Van Duyne, meanwhile, said she knew too little about the deal. How did we even get introduced to this group?” she asked. “Have we properly vetted them? Have we had enough time?”**
(Decoded response:  Funny, hasn’t she actually met with the new EC partnership folks, seen/reviewed the MOU to be considered by the council this week and talked with city staff about the MOU for the new Entertainment Center proposal?  Or is it possible that J. Ralph Ellis and Heinz Simon had not seen the MOU or talked with her or the involved partnership parties before she made her statement?)  

2. “...said Santoscoy, who like Gallaway is leaving the council after the election. “The goal is to be transparent. The public will be aware of everything we are going to do.”**
(Decoded response:  Wouldn’t this be a dramatic change from any Billy Bob/Charles Cotton clandestine meetings the ex-mayor or former council members might have had regarding the previous Entertainment Center debacle?  When did some former members of the council finally find the bright light switch?)

     See how you can better understand what the politico did or didn’t say?  Notice how the O-CRAP App instantly shoveled away political blather and allowed you to comprehend what the politico didn’t want you to know?

     So, send for your O-CRAP App now and become a better informed member of the voting public.  Isn’t it time that you turned your political cynicism into a political blessing through technology?

…………………...Mark Holbrook

** DMN, Avi Selk, 05-08-13