Dear Readers:
With the holiday season reaching a high note, what better way to celebrate than with a large glass of Merlot, chopped liver (yours) pâté on thin crisp toast and a song celebrating Irving’s ruler of the realm…QueenB VD.
As a special holiday bonus to all dear readers, staff of the CCR would like to gift you a copy of the newly released iTune hit, "The 12 Days of BVD" as sung by the Sons of the Rebel-K Overpass Choir with Glenn Beck warbling the refrain.
Join staff of the CCR and hum along (tune: The 12 Days of Christmas) with joy and recognize the gifts of self-achievement bestowed, by your queen, on Irving citizens this holiday season.
(By the way, QueenB VD can do in three days what it takes mere mortals to do in twelve…just ask her. And it's common knowledge in Irving that any event always has to be about her.
Since the queen's bounty was so great this year, she decided to extend her holiday giving to spread all acquired "Dark Money" riches over twelve days to the peons of her realm.)
Since the queen's bounty was so great this year, she decided to extend her holiday giving to spread all acquired "Dark Money" riches over twelve days to the peons of her realm.)
"The 12 Days of BVD"
by
Mark Holbrook
(With musical apologies to those attending King Pepin’s Ball in 1780)
On the first day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me….one Hollywood-ish pose from T.J. Lee.
Photo: Dallas Morning News
On the second day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me….two downtrodden and pie à la glee.
Photo: The Rambler
On the third day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me….three bad hair day mane flips stinging like a bee.
Photo: Dallas Morning News
On the fourth day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me.…four YouTube videos of babbling Red Meat carnivore-TEA.
Photo: Dallas Morning News
On the fifth day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me….five signed copies of her hero's, Glenn Beck, autobiography.
Photo: Dallas Morning News
(Sing the refrain at this point)
On the sixth day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me….six personal "Keep Irving Divisive" FaceBook pages with Flying Harpies.
On the seventh day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me….seven "unsavory protestors" prancing with AK-47s in search of white sheets and TEA.
Photo: Dallas Morning News
On the eighth day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me...eight Pet Rock elves who would always agree.
On the ninth day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me...nine earthquake predictions assuring more Irving misery.
On the tenth day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me….ten obscene waves from her royal coach while parading on TV.
On the eleventh day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me…eleven protective suits from her armory.
On the twelfth day of Christmas-photo ops, my true queen gave to me….twelve affronting tail wags while distraught citizens plea.
(Sing the refrain, finish your Merlot and hope for an un-queenly year ahead.)
