Sunday, May 18, 2014

CCR 05-18-14: CCR Exclusive Interview

the   Controversial  Committee   Report
“We don’t raise sacred cows...we just butcher them.”

     As a result of the CCRs numerous contacts, sources and knowing folks who just like to jabber, we have scheduled an exclusive ‘off-the-record’ interview with one of QueenB VDs Pet Rocks.  However, there were some stipulations which had to be met before the gentleman would decide to speak to us.  Since none of these items involved money (which we thought strange knowing how many politicos operate), we agreed.  And the Pet Rock agreed we could publish any of his off-the-record comments...which was even stranger!

     For the record, the CCR agreed to the following stipulations: do not refer to mayor BVD as QueenB VD, since he has to bow each time the phrase is printed or uttered; he demanded that a fresh pitcher of Kool-Aid (grape flavored) be available just in case he started to have withdrawal symptoms; no pictures could be taken as folks might recognize his facial hair; we had to meet somewhere outside the Irving city limits (Kincaid’s in South Lake)

     Here’s what’s bubbling under the political landscape in ‘beautiful downtown Irving’ as relayed by one of the queen’s Pet Rocks.  The insights gained could be the primer on how Irving city government might function over the next three years.  It is suggested that readers take a Cymbalta® capsule when finished.  This will help ease your depression symptoms.  

CCR:  So we are clear, are you the head Pet Rock in the mayor’s rockery?  While we understand she has enough rocks to sink votes on issues of her determination, do you act as the Head Pet Rock-Whip to ensure all the other stones fall into place?

PR:  Oh, gosh no.  The Head Pet Rock-Whip is much smarter than me and actually plays tennis.  Also, when he speaks at meetings, folks might actually understand what he is conveying.  I just follow his lead, because I know he has gotten his marching orders and instructions directly from the mayor who is not haughty in his presence. 

CCR:  That leads right to the first question on many CCR readers  There has been much speculation about how the MOU (Memorandum of Understanding) with OliverMcMillan evolved with a tennis center included as an “optional consideration.”  Can you shed some light on this?  It seems as if the mayor has attempted to downplay this entire MOU issue from the start.  In other words, like she was “really,” perhaps not honestly, surprised a tennis center had been included in the very pretty and detailed architectural drawings.

PR:  All I know is what I was the MOU, don’t ask any questions and ‘wink‘ when anyone questions if this consideration of a tennis center was really “optional” for the mayor.  You know she is an avid tennis fan and has seen the disastrous financial numbers for what facilities similar to this produce...a lot of red ink and little tourism.  Doesn’t this sound OK to you that we proceed with a tennis center for our city on the old Texas Stadium site?  We don’t have one now and everyone else is getting an Entertainment Center...she says!

CCR:  Thank you, I’ll ask the questions.  Since the mayor knows this prime piece of Irving real estate doesn’t need a ‘boat anchor’ tenant, does this seem ethical to you how the she has handled this issue and flushed the MOU through the council at this point in time?  After all, the council (other than maybe some Pet Rocks) had little time to review or discuss the MOU before she had it on an agenda for approval.  Is this her definition of transparency and openness, or just plain aloofness?

PR:  The answers to those questions are really above my ‘pay grade.’ (snicker)  But I do know that the mayor is going to push through her ethics policy now that she has a majority of Pet Rocks on the council.  And under her ethics policy, issues like this will not be considered or even discussed...unless she invokes a royal edict and is dismissive of those who question her authority.  That’s why her ethics policy has never been approved by the council in the three years she has served as mayor.  The policy was too burdensome, unenforceable and tilted to those in power.  Her ethics policy did little to produce any assurances for benefit of public awareness or accountability.  Actually, it was as if she really didn’t want an ethics policy passed.  That way she could always have a campaign issue and blame the policy not passing on someone else.  Could we pause this interview...I need a good shot of Kool-Aid now?

CCR:  Sure.  Take your time.  This must difficult for you to provide honest responses to events that have been happening at city hall behind the curtain of non-transparency.  After all, the responses citizens read in press articles when Pet Rocks or the mayor might be questioned are so stuffed with fluff, do not answer the real question and are mostly evasive...that is if they even respond to queries.  One more question and we’ll end the interview for this session.   Are you really proud of your status as being one of the mayor’s Pet Rocks on the council?

PR:  Honestly, I think so.  Really.  After all, I’m able get to get out of the house frequently; sit in a lot of meetings; grin when anyone talks or recognizes me; eat some good free meals; have free tickets to major sporting events provided...but not under my front door mat, mind you; nod my approval on issues I know little about; and attempt to sound as if I have everything under control...just as the mayor would want me to do.  Oh, and I get paid to do all this.  That’s the best part.

CCR:  Thanks for your time.  We’ll wait two or so weeks and sit down again after the latest Pet Rock is installed at the queen’s coronation on May 22, 2014.  We’ll discuss events some council meetings have produced to gauge how things are going under the Pet Rock realm of QueenB VD (sorry, you didn’t have to bow to me).

……………………...Mark Holbrook