the Controversial Committee Report
“We don’t raise sacred cows...we just butcher them.”
In days of yore, members of Irving’s royal family (duly elected) were responsible for their own areas of the realm (some called them Districts). Each had a personal fiefdom to preserve and protect.
With little or no interference, Irving’s royal family members served as the ruling authorities of the kingdom and personally addressed issues, kept all their serfs and peons pleased, and only gave a passing tithe to the king or queen for the gratitude of their benevolence. The king or queen of the realm, at this time, actually was a figurehead and fully understood their position in relation to the other members of the royal family within the kingdom.
However, when QueenB VD clawed, scratched and photo oped her way to her throne of self-perceived power four years ago, all matters in the realm changed. And the change was not advocated or determined by royal family members, but rather by the queen’s self-interest and desire for self-gratification.
The most significant change made was most of Irving’s royal family members no longer controlled their specific areas of the realm. The queen usurped previous writs, decrees and doctrines by installing herself as the one and only ruler of certain areas of the kingdom. The affected royal family members soon became the figureheads and were thought, by many, as actually being members of the queen’s Court Jester staff.
While being browbeaten, the royal family members, who lost control of their Districts, had to follow each and every dictate of QueenB VD. To the letter. Without exception. The queen’s dictates were the new law of their land.
(It should be noted, if the queen’s dictates were not followed, she would banish non-followers to her Tower of Obedience where they would be harassed and tortured by the Mother Superior of Flying Harpies and her flock. This interment was designed to encourage any wayward royal family member back into submission.)
QueenB VDs reign over these Districts became so vicious and strict, the disaffected royal family members would turn into stone in her presence.
(And this, dear readers, is how some royal family members of the ruling authority became known as the queen’s Pet Rocks.)
As with all dictatorial regimes, there was a time when opposition to the oppression of QueenB VDs dictates became intolerable. Soon, the royal family members who still had control of their Districts — which were opposed to the queen — realized she and her Pet Rocks were not effectively serving all the serfs and peons of the kingdom. Rather, the Pet Rocks were kowtowing to the self-aggrandizing impulses and arrogance of the queen.
With the Pet Rocks still believing that whatever the queen wanted she should have, they blindly ceded to her desires thinking they still served the serfs and peons of their District.
For three years, the struggle over righting the kingdom, for the benefit of all serfs and peons, continued. And then it became apparent QueenB VD was vulnerable and the time was ripe for her being overthrown by losing her Pet Rock collection.
With the possible defection (by successfully completing a detox program for Kool-Aid addicts) of two of the queen’s Pet Rocks — after her total smoking ban ordinance dictate and ploy was defeated — the message was clear…the time was at hand for an all out frontal assault on the throne to restore the Districts with new royal family members.
While more of the junta to abolish the queen’s dictatorial dictates and Pet Rock collection will be chronicled in the upcoming weeks, serfs and peons should unite now to assist the real protectors of the Districts in realizing that the queen’s self-serving persona and Pet Rocks have been Wrong. Wrong for the kingdom. Wrong for all serfs and peons. And Wrong for what the Districts actually need for the betterment of the kingdom.
Serfs and Peons of Irving…unite for the May 9th election and help restore the kingdom to its rightful place. Unite and follow the banners in battle for:
Irving Council District 4 (Joe Putnam)
Joe Putnam has lived, breathed and served the citizens of this District with only one interest in mind…doing what is right for the people. He has been the one protector to ensure the rights of the District have always been recognized and met. He has been tireless in his efforts to curtail the actions of the queen which promote her self-interest above the city’s best interest. Citizens of District 4: Unite behind Joe Putnam and help ensure Irving’s future from queenly oppression is abated. Keep a strong fighter for your concerns at the round table of the ruling authority.
Pretenders who might do little or nothing and could possibly waiver in their support of the District via queenly threats or her spiked mead are David Gutierrez, Phil Riddle, and Don Wilson. These names may be familiar as ones who previously have attempted to gain a foothold in the District or realm for purely personal or political reasons. The survival of the kingdom should not be left to fate or neophytes. These individuals could be just one bow away from assisting the queen and her Pet Rocks retain the stranglehold of power over all serfs and peons. The District would not be best served with the election of any one of these individuals.
Irving Council District 6 (Bill Mahoney)
Bill Mahoney brings a formable and positive list of achievements to the round table of service in Irving. And his primary trait is he is not beholden to any of the queen’s legions of Flying Harpies, SugarDaddy contributors, or single source developers as the queen’s chief lackey might be. After witnessing what had happened in the District over the past three years — with the queen’s Chief Pet Rock — he realized the critical needs of the District were not being met. And those needs could not be obtained unless an independent thinker, promoter for the best interest of the city and one who truly understood what serving the District should mean battled the tyrant queen’s manservant. He has accepted the gauntlet to run against the queen and her Chief Pet Rock. He is lacking no fear in knowing the queen will muster all of her forces to ensure her Chief Pet Rock maintains control of the District. And if ever a Pet Rock needed to be cracked, this would be the one where all serfs and peons of the District should marshall their pitchforks and votes. Irving and the District would greatly benefit when this occurs.
Without a doubt, the queen’s Chief Pet Rock, Brad LaMorgese, has done little to represent the interest of the District. (Seriously, how could he when his every action is controlled?)
Instead, he has been the consistent mouthpiece and unofficial spokesperson for the queen in council meetings, gatherings and any other setting where the queen preens for exposure. Reading her talking points on issues confirms his lack of independent thinking and abates what he was originally elected to do…serving the people of the District. When the queen pulls his strings (which is all too often), he jerks with joy and a self-pleasing smile. Isn’t the time at hand to erase his Smirk of Obedience to the queen?
Irving Council District 8 (David Palmer)
David Palmer recognizes that the time for a silent server and avid Pet Rock of the queen should come to an end. As an independent businessman who lives and works in the kingdom, Palmer has already served citizens by devoting considerable time and attention to community service and participating in those activities which greatly benefit the city at large. And the District he strives to return to the citizens is an at-large District…meaning voters citywide can cast a ballot to support his efforts to remove another of the queen’s Pet Rock collection. Being on the ruling authority will mean he is a champion of the District…not the queen.
A frequent and malleable server of the queen, Tom Spink originally won his election by hanging on to the hem of QueenB VDs skirt. And he rewarded the queen with a pledge of total fealty. During all this time, he has rarely, if ever, strayed from her dictates, desires, or wants. (And if you weren’t sure, all of her wants were for self-promotion, photo ops, Sugar Daddy contributors, single source developers, and conservative red meat Tea sipping pals.) The District has been severely shortchanged with his being an expendable token in the queen’s rock collection. Every voter of the kingdom will have an opportunity to remove this queenly follower as the District is an at-large one. Isn’t now the time to chunk this Pet Rock back into the queen’s gravel pit?
While the election season will commence with an onslaught of pamphlets, advertisements and signs, the only thing to remember is QueenB VD has broken long established protocol, with all the mayors who previously served the city, by campaigning directly for sitting members of the ruling authority. And this is an important item for voters to consider and remember.
When the Pet Rocks, in this campaign, LaMorgese and Spink solicit your vote, be sure to ask or check if anywhere in their campaign babbling they recognize the fact of being totally loyal to QueenB VDs dictates. This is an important consideration, as it will infer they will be servicing her agenda over the actual needs of the District where they were elected to serve.
After all, Irving should be served by a democratic ruling authority, Mahoney and Palmer, not by regal dictates of a politically ambitious mayor with scant concern for the city at large…unless a photographer is present.