Sunday, February 14, 2016

CCR 02-14-16 A Chuckles Mailing

the   Controversial  Committee   Report
“We don’t raise sacred cows...we just butcher them.”

"A Chuckles Mailing"

   One just never knows!  Since mailing the 02-11-15 CCR report, "Mopping Up Publicity," featuring the new QueenB VD Photo Op Doppelgänger©, request have been pouring in to use this amazing mayor-on-a-stick for pics everywhere.

   And it appears the primary reason for so many requests is due to QueenB VD being ultra selective in where she wants to have her pic snapped.  Not every event can match or meet her qualifications for a photo op or YouTube filming session.  (After all, she is the queen...isn't she?)

   Staff of the CCR has been working overtime to produce several more doppelgängers to meet the high demand of requests.  Demand seems to be outstripping even the number of photo op sessions QueenB VD has actually made this past month.

   The CCR contracted with Pics-R-Us to deliver and pick up the doppelgänger for your photo op events which saves you tremendous time and effort.  This speedy deliver system also works best when QueenB VD has agreed to attend or participate in your event, but fails to show.  

   Why, the CCR, with Pics-R-Us, can even beat Domino’s® pizza rapid delivery time by having a mayor-on-a-stick at your event within ten minutes.

   The QueenB VD Photo Op Doppelgänger is ideal for: 
Birthday parties; bar/bat mitzvahs; house warming; brit milch; 50th wedding anniversaries; Quinceañera celebrations; purchase of a new car; new job/promotion; wakes; quilting bees; feral cat neutering; Confirmations; birth of puppies; ground breaking; MLK Day parade; ribbon cuttings; dental implants; last rites; hospital visits; weekend conference travels; new roadway openings; Dollar Store expansions; smoke-filled room meetings; final divorce decree; or any event which the queen might deem to be below her exalted status.    

   It should be noted, the CCR doppelgänger will not be available for any Red Meat TEA-carnivore gatherings.  

   Simply stated, staff of the CCR takes pride in their doppelgänger by not participating in events which are divisive, create hate and discontent, or further fear-mongering to gain notoriety.

   You’ll not see the CCR doppelgänger at a Ted "Lizard Grin" Cruz rally, or a Glenn Beck Tin Foil Hat Revolution program where facts are fabricated, misinformation spouted, and self-aggrandizing and pious utterances are blabbed.  

   What users of the CCRs QueenB VD Photo Op Doppelgänger have told us is: "The beauty of having pics made in this manner is that it eliminates having to listen to the queen babble political rubbish and spout her self-interest concerns."

    Don’t wait!  Book your QueenB VD Photo Op Doppelgänger today.  

………………………….Mark Holbrook

NOTE:  The QueenB VD Photo Op Doppelgänger is not endorsed by "Dark Money" hustlers and contributors, special interest groups, single source developers, or cronies sucking Economic Development tax funds from the city for private business interests or developments.